Today’s Hint: How to Get Your Ideal Mother’s (or Father’s) Day

Mother’s Day is still a few days away, but I already know what my husband bought me, and I have a rough idea of how we’re going to spend the Hallmark holiday. This isn’t because my husband gave me my gift, and our Mother’s Day itinerary, early.

Rather, a few weeks ago, I spelled out exactly what I wanted in a catalog around our house, circling fancy lotions I love, but that I feel bad splurging on myself.

And I also made sure to bring up the topic of what we’re going to do on Mother’s Day, noting that I’d love to take a spinning class in the morning and have some time just to relax, and then do something fun with the family for the remainder of the day.

At this point, I believe my second Mother’s Day is going to turn out pretty much how I’ve envisioned. This is why today’s hint is this method for getting your ideal Mother’s (or Father’s) Day: Don’t feel bad about letting your significant other know exactly what you want and how you’d like to spend the day.

In fact, unless your spouse or partner is a mind reader, expressing what you want is probably the only way you’re actually going to get the day you want. And I know this from experience.

While my first Mother’s Day was great, I didn’t get that massage gift certificate I hadn’t let anyone know I wanted (I should have listened to my friend when she sent me an email with a massage gift certificate deal, suggesting I forward it along to my husband like she was going to do to hers).

I’m not the only one advocating that moms speak up for what they want on their special day (and the advice can apply to dads too). The blog “Work it, Mom!” advises working moms to “speak up and get what you want” for Mother’s Day. Elsewhere, the site Bounty.com offers great tips for how to “master the art of the subtle hint” to get your perfect Mother’s Day, and UrbanSitter recently sent out a promotional email on “dropping hints for Sunday.”

To be sure, asking for what you want may seem a bit ungrateful, and could spoil a surprise in the works. Still, having at least a discussion about the day you envision should lessen the chance of disappointment and resentment.

Of course, not everyone is going to feel comfortable following this advice. If you find that your significant other didn’t speak up and you’re at a loss for how to make Mother’s Day special, ask her what she wants. This piece from nerdwallet’s blog also has some good advice on what moms really want for Mother’s Day (think time alone), and the site Cool Mom Picks also has some cute gift ideas in its 2014 Mother’s Day Gift Guide. Elsewhere, Olivia Howell of The Lovely Sisters (and a Hint Mama contributor) shares some great gift ideas in her post “What a New Mom Really Wants for her First Mother’s Day” (I’d love #1 on her list).

What are your thoughts on letting your significant other know exactly what you want for days like Mother’s Day? Yea or nay, and why? What’s your ideal Mother’s (or Father’s) Day, and what are your tips for making it a reality?

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